Sometimes the Lord puts something on my heart to share that I get so excited about I can hardly wait. This isn’t one of them.
This has been on my heart since radiation on Friday. I’ve tried to ignore it, but I can’t. I’ve said, “GOD, this is too private. This is too sensitive. This feels too vulnerable. I don’t want to share.”
And I was reminded, it’s not about me. I’ve promised to say what HE leads me to say, no matter what.
If it’s for one person, that’s enough.
A few years ago I was in the loneliest time of my life.
Some of it was real – I lost several support systems in a short time period. People I loved- gone and suddenly out of my life.
Some of it was an attack of the enemy – I let him make me think no one cared. He loves to do that!
Some of it was me – I put up walls so high to protect myself from hurt ever happening again.
Real or not, I felt totally and completely alone.
You know the great thing about feeling alone? To survive you have to turn to the One who sticks closer, even than a brother. (Proverbs 18:24).
I’ve loved JESUS my whole life. But it was in that time of isolation that HE really became my whole life. When I felt like HE was all I had, I realized HE was all I needed.
As I was lying on the radiation table on Friday, I was reminded of that time in my life. I was reminded of the hurt and pain. I was reminded of the tears. I was reminded of how much I couldn’t understand why it had happened. I was reminded that although I hated it so very much, it was exactly what I needed. Why?
Because it was during that time, I learned JESUS was enough and HE never left me.
So, when I’ve had to go to surgery alone
Walk into appointments by myself
Or be the only one in a scary room for a treatment, I NEVER felt alone. EVER.
Because the lonely time in my life taught me I am truly never alone. HE is with me. Always.
The lonely time prepared me for this time of purpose.
So why share? Because if you are feeling alone, I need you to know, You’re not. HE is with you. Always. This isn’t a time to mourn. It’s a time to cling to the ONE who will never leave you.Even this time will be used for your good and HIS glory. It’s HIS promise. Trust the process.
“And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” Matthew 29:20
HE loves you. HE is with you. ALWAYS. Cling to HIM. The path may look scary and lonely, but HE is right beside you. I Promise. I’m living proof.
